Our Masterpieces...Err, Our Novels

Monday, August 1, 2011

Baby WIPs: Quita's Edition!

Reminiscing Song of the Day: "Teenage Dirtbag" by Wheatus

As Pam mentioned here last Monday, we just moved into a house that she bought. During that process, we came across some of our old stories and "novels". Now, I can't go back as far as Pam did with "Never Say Never". I wish I would've kept the cute stories I wrote when I was a kid, but instead I kept mountains of notebooks from my teenage years. One of those notebooks (this one was actually a folder) is a book I wrote at age 15, called: Milton High: Volume 1, Book 1: Lover's Quarrel. I was ambitious, huh? I thought I was gonna have volumes of this book!

Okay, I know you're dying to read a piece of this epic novel (if not, please feed my ego and pretend that you are). So, without any more delaying, here is page one of Chapter 1.

Chapter 1: A Look In the Lives... (typed verbatim--typos, grammatical errors on purpose)

"Good Morning Milton High. Amanda's arrived so all conversation may begin." Amanda Donaldson said walking into the school. Her deep blue eyes glistening. Austin Donaldson's eyes were doing the same as he laughed at his fraternal twin sister.

"A-dog!" Kevin Bowlen said jogging up to Austin.

"What's up, Kev?" Austin asked as they dapped each other up.

"Let's walk and talk...what's up Lila?" He asked as him and Kevin walked past her.

"Eat me." She said holding up her middle finger.

"Ooooh!" Austin said as he and Kevin walked away.

"Well, I see someone has expanded their vocabulary." Amanda said opening her locker.

"What? Why the hell are you talking to me, Barbie?" Lila Fargo asked as she put her combination in.

"Hey, Mandy! Guess what!" Live Fargo exclaimed. She threw a disgusted look at her identical twin sister then continued on smiling at Amanda.

"Well...what? Don't leave me in suspense!" Amanda said.

And with that, I will leave YOU in suspense! Anybody else have a piece of early fiction they want to share? Oh, and feel free to critique. Who knows? I might take a crack at Volume 1, Book 2 ;)


KO: The Insect Collector said...

My eyes glistened once, but I had to go to the doctor to get a prescription for it.

Your dialog is actually not that bad. I think some dialog I wrote about 2 years ago was not much better. For fifteen, you were rocking!

Jennifer Pickrell said...

What, why did you leave us in suspense???

And KO is right, the dialog is spot on, sounds exactly like a convo I would have overheard in the hallway when I was in school.

The Blue Lipstick Samurai said...

I have read published YA books like this, go fifteen year old you! :DD Can't wait until YOU are published!

Racquel Henry said...

Haha Quita, I love it! My favorite line was: "Eat me." She said holding up her middle finger. LOL. Thanks for sharing, like I told you guys last week, I'm so stealing this idea! :)

Yahong said...

A-dog?? Bahaha, I don't know any teen alive who says that. :D Nice going!

Meredith said...

There are a lot of twins at that school! ;) And I agree with everyone else that the dialogue sounds pretty authentic!

Alicia Gregoire said...

This feature is great. I recently went through my HS writing (it's the earliest I kept) and it's pretty similar.

Marquita Hockaday said...

@KO- LOL! Yeah, that wouldn't be too normal for your eyes to just glisten, huh?

@Blue Lipstick--You are the BEST :) Thanks for the love!

@Yahong--yeah, there def. aren't any teens who say things like "A-dog" anymore.

@Meredith--I used to really want a twin...projecting, much??

Thanks you guys for loving on my dialogue--even though it's purely awful :)

@Racquel--I hope you do steal this idea.

We hope ALL of you steal it. We would LOVE to see how you guys wrote when you were younger!

Jessica Love said...

I love this! It sounds exactly like the stuff I wrote at that age!

Abby Stevens said...

Seriously, this has me needing to go find my old stuff! I agree with the rest, I think the dialogue is pretty darn good. You have an ear for it now, and apparently did then, too. :)

Ghenet Myrthil said...

I love that you guys are sharing these "baby WIPs" with us!